Peek a Boo!

I know.. I know.. I know. My posts on here lately have been few and very far in between. What can I say? I've just been a busy lady puttering around the house after my son and doing loads of yard work! It's true I've been trying to paint my thumb green! We'll find out next year how well I did. I had no idea how much planting would be such a workout! Sheesh!

I'm sure your wondering how this pregnancy is going so far. I'm happy to announce that it's going pretty well. Other than a urinary tract infection I've been doing good and feeling pretty well. I did have a minor melt down day a few weeks back but I'll save that juicy story for another post.:) I'm 12 weeks today! Yay! Bring it on 2nd trimester!
I do have to admit I'm feeling nervous at the moment. I know that God is in control and am at peace in His will whatever it may be but I am having trouble shaking these nerves. You see this Monday I have my next appointment for the baby. I only see doctors now so I'll actually be seeing the same doctor that delivered Mazio. He's very nice! Well now that I'm 12 weeks along they will start using a doppler at each appointment to hear and document the baby's heart beat. This Monday will be my first appointment that I will get to hear this baby's precious heart beat. A day that most women would be absolutely thrilled about but a day that brings me a gut wrenching realization of the moment that ended my previous pregnancy.

I was about 12 weeks when I went to this very same type of appointment where I would hear the heart beat of my baby from the previous pregnancy only to have that day end in complete and utter turmoil instead of unending joy. I never got to hear that baby's heart beat and quickly learned that same day that the baby was no longer living. You can read more about my previous pregnancy and loss under the tab at the top labeled " Missing my baby girl".

Any way that is the root of my nerves for this appointment on Monday. I so badly long to hear the healthy thumping of this baby's heart! What joy and music it'd be to my ears after all this time to hear my baby's heart beat! I pray often that God would help get me through this day. I'll be alone too well except I might have Mazio with me which I recall now that he was there when my hopes came crashing down as well on that fateful day. Hopefully Monday will be a different day filled with joy and sighs of relief! I have no reason to believe based on my symptoms thus far to expect any bad news but you just never know. I feel good and have had no spotting like I did with the last pregnancy so I'm hoping that is a good sign. Please keep me in your thoughts and prayers! I promise to post after my appointment on how it went.